The Gauntlet has Been Thrown....

...sparing me the agony of coming up with another alliterative blog title.

Fine, Miss Wendy, you want a Tiki blog-off? You got one!

This past Saturday we were treated to fabulous extravaganza at Mike and Sandy's Beach House and Tropical Drinks Emporium.

(On a side note, J10X & I had primed ourselves for hardcore tiki-drinking action by sampling my newest concoction- Rosemary Martinis made with freshly infused rosemary vodka....)

We arrived, fashionable attired in Punktiki(TM) style, fashionably late, with some drunken bum in tow, to the lovely tropically warm beach house and were greeted by the glorious sight of Miss Wendy, Our Hosts, Boojums, Brian & Mel....um, Negative Ed & Lisa.....some people I don't think we properly met....

Drinks! Yes! A huge table of booze & mixers! Mike & Sandy were insanely generous and provided both food and beverage- I was somewhat nonplussed by the announcement that we had arrived and I would be making drinks. Wha....? But that requires...memory! Ultimately, my queenly self got its act together & made a pitcher of Mai-tais & several individual drinks.

(Another side note- Tiki is all about the drinks, don't let anyone tell you any differently....)

We had the opportunity to chat with Mike & Sandy and gawk at all their Tiki decor goodness - gorgeous masks, mini-surfboards....books! Mike also gave us an entire tour of the Aloha Compound as well. We also caught up with others we hadn't seen in a while, and Negative Ed & I bonded over the magical, medicinal qualities of Newcastle Ale....

Mike & Jess, who organize the New England Tiki Tour arrived a little later, with Tim from Waitiki and his lovely lady in tow. The fantastic 9th Wave and Waitiki will be playing the tour this year.....fun!

A little later in the evening we convened down in the basement to hear some surftastic tunes by Mike, Fred and Negative Ed, Sandy and Brian, and then some Summertime Blues with Lushy Luke sitting in on the skins....

J10X & I had much fun & stayed far too late- my car almost turned into a pineapple, but we managed to reach it in time to head home on waves of rum...and that special ohana feeling!

Many mahalos to Mike & Sandy for a fantastic time!!

Retro Video Recap

This morning I flipped through the channels to check the weather, and I happened upon a Clash video - and then more videos from the 80s. Sure, they're cheesy, but oh so much more entertaining and strange than the slick, boring, predictable dreck produced these days....
The Clash video was 'Rock the Casbah': Armadillos galore! The band playing in an oil field! McDonalds! I know this song is trying to tell me something, but the images are confusing, they make no sense...oh, yeah! it's an 80s video! Nothing has to make sense!
So, I thought I was done, then I saw the unkempt tresses of:
Bananarama..... 'Cruel Summer' - boring song, ugly video, terrible fashion (from an English group, yet!), and what's with the 'Dukes of Hazzard' references? Weird.
Ok, by now I was kind of sucked in and repelled at the same time, and then the ever-bizarre,
'Obsession' by Animotion started up- had to watch, it's a really odd train wreck of a video: lots of costumes, bad 80s fashion, bad hair cuts & a sideways ponytail...bad lipsynching and, for my money, some of the creepiest lyrics I've ever heard in a pop song. (Seriously, I could probably write an entire entry on the incredible weirdness of the song & video.)
Madness' 'Our House' started & I had to see that one - silly, fun, and drab, as it was filmed in England....oh, and were Suggs and Matt Damon separated at birth? And what about the guy that looks a heck of a lot like Michael Palin?
Well, that was enough 80s nostalgia for me....I eventually had to get a move on so I could get into my legwarmers in time for aerobics class...

Need Some Punk Rock Reference Materials?

Go to Amy Roberson's page! Oi Oi Oi!

Celestial Sightings, or, Lookin' at la Lune

I hope everyone who was able to saw the incredibly beautiful lunar eclipse last night! When I walked out of work in New London at 10 PM, the eclipse was beginning- the moon was an orangey-red and flanked by two bright celestial bodies- the planet Saturn and the star Regulus in the constellation of Leo. I stood outside with New London Harbor to my left and an unstarred sky (except for the eclipse and its attendants), completely awestruck. The last time I was this affected by something in the sky was the appearance of a comet (was it Halley's?) and I observed it while driving home at night. It's very plain to me how events like these can impact people's worldview, past and present.

It also struck me that getting annoyed at some students for being too loud was really...insignificant.

When I got home, the moon was fully eclipsed and we looked at it though binoculars- amazing! Then I periodically checked on the 'uneclipsing' of the moon, which was less colorful but no less beautiful.

Fun fact: Since I spotted the eclipse last night, Cher's 'Dark Lady' has been running endlessly through my head....enjoy!

'Best' Reference Desk Question All Week

Student: "Do you know how to make a web page?"

Librarian: "Well, yes."

Student: "Can you give me a 30 second tutorial?"

Librarian: "Well, no."

Student: "60 second?"

Happy Anniversary, Pootie-Pie!

This weekend's milestone event was the 7th anniversary of the meeting of the Queen & J10X, the 7th anniversary of me grabbing Bernie by his Road Agents jacket & yelling 'Hey, Do you know Luke?!?! I know Luke!'

The rest, as they say, is history.

Little Eats in New London

This is going to be just a short entry that will hopefully lead to more in the same vein.

I find it intriguing to work a position in which my schedule changes depending on the school year, especially when foraging for food. So far, I've managed to sample a few of the many eateries in New London:

The Hot Dog House on Montauk Ave.: My Favorite New Place. The food is good and simple, and I am completely addicted to the fresh sweet potato fries - an order of those & soup (Black Bean with Pork is divine) makes for a very satisfying meal. This little bistro is very clean, the decor is fun and the owners are absolute dolls- Venus & his wife are as friendly as can be - Venus himself speaks in declarative sentences: 'The same type a food we eat at home!' 'The sweet patata fries are always fresh!' 'So, whaddya know, she's gonna blog about us!' It's always a delight to go in, have a chat, and leave with some good eats.

Saeed's International Market on Ocean Ave.: I never regret getting anything to eat here. They have every permutation of spinach & feta (the kihi being my favorite) and delicious felafel wraps. They also have many fun, exotic eats & sodas, but those can be a wee bit pricey.

The Recovery Room on Ocean Ave. (across from Saeed's): Excellent thin crust pizza (the spinach & gorgonzola is my favorite) and humongous salads that are really meals for two people. The atmosphere is cozy, unless it's extremely busy, and the prices are fair. More of a place to go when you have time to sit and eat, but calling in an order works, too.

The Bean & Leaf Cafe: Another contender for Favorite New Place- they have excellent fair trade coffees & teas and great food - the paninis are really satidfying, served with homemade pita chips, hummus and a small salad. There is plenty of seating & local talents are given a chance to shine. I first visited when they hosted our college's Digital Photography class show.

The Montauk Cafe & Market on Montauk Ave.: This is a little sandwich-and-coffee joint that's within a short walking distance from work - I've had really great sandwiches here (the Cowboy Sandwich is really great- kind of a messy reuben) and they have Green Mountain coffee, which is always fresh, hot & strong. The only downside is that they shut at 2:30 PM....

Well, that's it for now....hopefully some of you readers (all 4 or 5 of you) will visit these places & report your experiences!

Wet, Wild & Woolly Weekend

This past weekend was certainly a whirlwind, starting with a quick nip after work on Thursday at the Cedarwood Lounge attached to the Willi Bowling Alley - not exactly the most glamorous place, but the drinks are strong, big & cheap....like some men I know...

Friday night, Bernie & accompanied Lushy Luke to the incredibly hideous Sneakers Sports Bar in Ashford (I would like to point out it was LL's idea and we are such loyal friends that we agreed to go). The pictures in the link make the place look good; I'm pretty sure we were the only three in there with a full set of teeth and not wearing plaid. The two video games they have are Bowling & Extreme Hunting and some scary looking guy was using the air hockey table as a coat rack. I'll bet the air hockey table is the cause of most of those people losing their teeth - extreme puck action! I think I drank all the Stoli they had in the two hours we were there....and then it was.....

Saturday.

I started off the day hungover because I apparently over-consumed during the two hours I was tortured at the above-mentioned redneck hell-hole. Fortunately, instead of feeling sorry for myself all day, I knew we had plans for the evening: hanging out with Miss Wendy in New London to celebrate her birthday at the Hygienic Art 29 festivities!

We had a restorative dinner at the Asian Bistro, then headed out to the Whaling City after switching outerwear and clothing around. We stopped first at the Golden Street Gallery and saw some great pieces by the artists featured there - it was also sanely populated, which was nice. On our way there, we popped in to see the work being done on the old El 'n' Gee club - they have completely redone the bathrooms (hooray- it had gotten CBGB-esque in those loos!) with Joan Jett & Johnny Cash painted on the doors, a new bar shaped like a guitar, new floors, and they've removed the separator between the bar & stage. The guys working told us the plan was to have a variety of acts, from theater to comedy to music. However, one of the local artists said she had heard it was being turned into a "gentlemen's club" - let's hope not.

We then popped over to Sarge's Comics (the Popular Place for Anniversaries & Birthdays!) and touched everything, but had to leave because they were closing. Miss Wendy did try to convince me to bargain for the Promethea action figure that's been sitting there forever....but I wasn't up to it.

So then, off to the events! It was icy cold out, which meant that once people were in a building, it was tough to get them out. We were not able to get into any of the rock shows at any time as the two clubs were seriously packed. We did give the Hygienic Gallery a try, but I got halfway through before having a major attack of claustrophobia & sprinting out the back door. There was very little to be seen well because there was no room to back up and look at any of the work- a return trip is necessary! Bernie & I managed to find & extricate Miss Wendy, then we all decided we needed drink, because after all, it was a birthday celebration.

We ended up at the Bank Street Roadhouse (which is generally rednecky on non-festival nights, but quite tolerable on this Saturday) and the Rivergods were playing- a very nice, upbeat set for sure (Fun Fact: Nancy from the Rivergods is the sister of my immediate supervisor). Drinks du nuit were vodka tonics and gin & tonics for Bernie. It started getting a little crowded in there so we moved on.

We left and looked at the other clubs, noticing the clientele at this point were spilling onto the sidewalk- no way we were going to shove our way into that! We ended up at a restaurant bar for the rest of the evening having a nice chat & more drinks before heading home.

Thanks, Wendy, for letting us celebrate with you!

Vittles, Video Games & a Venue Change

Last Saturday, Bernie & I, along with some friends, made our first foray into the wild world of Dave & Buster's. At first I wasn't so sure about this place: it's located in Providence Place Mall, so I thought it would be loaded with small children. But joy of joys: ostensibly children are not allowed in there after 5:30 PM! Hooray!

The first obstacle was the parking garage, obviously designed by some sadistic non-driver. On every level there were a billion ways for other cars to zoom in & create near-hits as I awkwardly negotiated the same level 3 times.....we finally found our way out of the labyrinth and soared upwards to....the first level. I'm pretty sure some form of higher mathematics went into the numbering/naming of the levels, but I didn't have the Royal Slide Rule with me to figure it out.

After luckily finding a newly-vacated parking spot, we went right into the mall- I've never been to Providence Place Mall before - it's hellishly huge and seems to have all the same shops as every other mall, but I was told The Secret: as you go up each level, the stores escalate in price.....

We quickly found Dave & Busters and it was BUSY! We had been told it would be a two-hour wait for a table, so we planned on playing games, then eating. Luckily, we ended up with a table within 10 minutes, so we changed our plans. The food was fine, nothing special, but we did get some sort of deal where we received a $10 game card with our meal and our waiter was not only very entertaining, but very hot. Always makes the food just a little better.....So, fed & with a nice buzz going on (Belvedere was the drinkable vodka served there), it was off to the games!

The games were a bit overwhelming, what with all the flashing lights & the number of people around. Surprising to me, everyone was very fair about letting those waiting take a turn. There were driving games, flight simulators, AIR HOCKEY, shooting games, some strange roulette-type games, a crane machine with cheeeezy bling, boxing games- a lot of choices to be sure!

We hopped right on driving games to start- don't ask me the names, all I know is they tossed me around while I maniacally drove & was laughing hysterically...Miss Wendy, I have no idea how you could drive any of those games with a martini in hand! You are truly a Patsy Stone....
We played more games of that ilk, and of course I had to play with the flight simulator- graphics-wise, far more sophisticated than the one I trained on at Windham Airport, but far less accurate. For instance, I didn't crash nearly as many times....
Bernie & I accidentally hogged the ginormous, flourescent air hockey table for several games, Mikey played Donkey Kong for a really long time, and I tried my hand at Space Invaders- 'tried' as in 'tried to figure out how it worked' (it's been a loooong time) and then the message 'Game Over' appeared....

After a couple of hours, and using the Jaws of Life to pry Bernie way from the games, we were DONE. We noticed that around 8:30 or so, it started getting very meat-markety in there for the 18-21 year old set. Eeew.

My suggestion is not to go on a Saturday night- it was fun, but packed. And be prepared to spend some money! All in all, it was a really fun time and everyone was having fun on the same level- pretty cool!

********************************
So, what's all this about a venue change? Well, Bernie just landed his bad self a new job with the New London Housing Authority! Less hours, more money - whoo hoo! Congrats, pootie-pie!

....and now, Reality.

Sadly, this is the first day back to work since Dec. 21. It was so difficult to have to get ready & be out of the door within 2 hours of waking.....but, I have memories of a fabulously festive holiday season to soften the blow!

Bernie & I were fortunate enough to host some of our closest friends - the Wombats from Albany, Miss Wendy, Alex, Marko and the Boojums- for an impromptu cocktail party. I'm really beginning to appreciate the merits of smaller gatherings, especially the ability to be able to talk to all of our guests! It was especially nice to be able to make Wombat small-talk as we don't see them nearly as often as we'd like!

The next night, my parents threw a fantastic wine & cheese party for their neighbors - it was lovely, with really nice people and more cheese than even I could eat. (I'm pretty sure at this point I'll never have to worry about brittle bones with the amount of cheese I've consumed in the past week and a half....)

On New Year's Eve, we scrapped our original idea of going to Boston, but we didn't want to ring in the new year at home. So, we dolled up and headed over to the Mohegan Sun casino, of all places. But I'm glad we did- we 'discovered' a Mexican restaurant in there & made a ton of noise at midnight along with the other patrons- it was such fun! Then we cruised around, looked at the fab decorations and people-watched for a bit & then headed home.

Then we started the new year in the best way- we didn't do a damn thing all day. Hooray!

Air Hockey- Best. Game. EVER.

For my immediate family, Dec. 25th is a secular holiday of presents, food & family fun. As in years past, J10X & I arrive at my mom's house, fashionably late, with santa hats on our heads & my incredibly warm, long, heavy forest-green cloak about my shoulders. (It is of no surprise to me that people no longer wear substantial cloaks to drive- the shoehorning of myself & that garment into my car alone is a Herculean effort, never mind clearing enough room around me in a sea of wool to locate the car's gearshift.)

I have finally come to the realization that all along it is only my sister, mother & myself who get completely hysterical during the present opening. My 5 year old nephew (Jack) doesn't even get that excited, tho' he claimed to be way more excited than me. But there's just no way- he doesn't even get to drink mimosas before gifts.

But the most fun to be had was when my dad brought up an air hockey table he had purchased for my nephew - or so he thought. J10X & Jack tried it out (Jack employing the Nowyckyj Goal-Blocking Ploy- placing his forearm in front of his goal) but things really heated up when J10X & myself went head-to head. My dad was pretty sure we were destroying the table & my mom was laughing as hard as we were- air hockey can get very intense, very fast & very fun. Half the time you end up knocking the puck into your own goal by mistake, or in my case, sailing it onto the floor, into my sister's back, the walls, etc. Considering the advent of so many great computer games, Xboxes and the like, I was amazed at how intense a simple game like this could get- we were sweaty & totally crazy.

So, we finally peeled ourselves out of there & to home- we recuperated by watching 'Mr. Bean's Holiday' which was a tad disappointing- good effort made to create a story, but I expected way more silly stuff. This past weekend we also watched 'Harry Potter & the Order of the Phoenix' which I was only compelled to watch because I had seen all the other movies. I think with the exception of the 'Prisoner of Azkaban', they've all been disappointing. I've not read any of the books, but the movies tend to make me feel that a LOT has been left out.

So, now I have a week to create & read!

Happy Boxing Day!

Local heroes, libations, lashings of music and the lengthening of days...

Saturday night was a celebratory night for music in New London- Paul Brockett Roadshow Band's 2nd Anniversary show was opened & closed by The Reducers!

PBRB had goodies to give out- a CD of rollicking fun with music, skits and some bizarre yodelling barnyard shenanigans, a poster photo montage on the inside of the CD (with some pictures of people you know) and a fabulous pin.
PBRB wore their dress blacks onstage, looking very sharp. Their set had somethings old, something new, nothing borrowed and 'Can't Mix Gin with You' featuring the vocal stylings of Ms. Daphne Glover. It was fun, fast and fantastic!

[Note: if Paul is the Gentleman of New London, Meghan is certainly the Glamorous Spirit and both rest on the Solid Foundation that is Dave. And if that isn't enough for you, they're really terrific people, too....]

The Reducers were, as usual, their efficient, rocking selves- this band consistently over the past 20-odd years I've seen their shows just deliver the goods every time, with no fuss and exquisite form. They rock, plain and simple.

Seeing both bands in the same venue is always a treat as we always see our friends, too- everyone was filled with holiday joy and the joy of a great night of music. I was so happy to actually find that one spot in the place where I could actually hear someone talk, so I did spend that last set of the show chitchatting with, it seemed, half of the music-loving population of New London. A great night all around...

Happy Anniversary, Paul Brockett Roadshow Band!

Vodka & Me

We had a very good year.

I discovered in Women's Health magazine that my fave summertime vodka garnish, blackberries, are even better for you after being soaked in ethanol.

I have just now read that my very favorite potable, Reyka, is processed 'green' via geothermal heat. And they have no plans to ever flavor the vodka - skál !

Adrenaline

Adrenaline rushes come in two great flavors-the fun-I can't-believe-I didn't-hurt-myself-kind and the not fun-I can't-believe-I'm-not-dead-kind.

I experienced both tonight within 10 minutes of each other -two coworkers hit me up to sled down the considerably steep hill next to Mitchell Hall on a car sun reflector....scary, but so worth it! Whee!

A few minutes later, I hopped in my car to get something delicious from Saeed's International Market and turned up the wrong street - uphill into a completely iced-over parking lot with a steep slope. My car miraculously made it up there, and as I realized my error and turned my car around, it decided to do a double basic spin and slide sideways down the hill, while stalling. It recovered beautifully and I gave my car a 9.9 for a complicated routine....

Winter Zombie Night at the Aloha Alcohula (TM)

Last Friday, the Aloha Alcohula (TM)* had a little impromptu tiki drink gathering - featuring nothing less than Zombies made from the original c1938 recipe by Don the Beachcomber. And featuring nothing less than your intrepid hostess' homemade cinnamon syrup & falernum (#8) to boot.

Winter Zombie Night was dedicated to two people: the joey Zone and the lovely Adrienne at Stop & Shop who risked life & limb to retrieve the last 4 existing bottles of lime juice from the very back of the tallest shelf in the store. Your hostess wasn't able to milk enough limes for the Zombie-making without further damaging her delicate little wrists.

The joey Zone did a fine, fine job of giving an extensive tour to Mike & Sandy of 9th Wave fame, all the while explaining the provenance of every single piece of tchotchka - some of which I didn't even know, such as the fine lockers I purchased to house CDs & DVDs that apparently had belonged to a strip club in the past.....(we suspect it was probably the Log 'n' Lantern. )

So, thanks to those who came & drank and didn't throw up little fruity bits!

*Best tiki bar in Willimantic

Of Oil Tanks, Royale Footwork and a Hula Dancer.

This past weekend started with having my house's oil tank ripped from the soil - the entire process was completed by the time I returned from a far-too-early appointment. I was a little disappointed, because it would have been fun to see the process, but when I walked down my driveway at 9:30 AM, my oil tank was dangling from a backhoe & the hole was completely filled! Hooray!

Friday night, Johnny von 10X and I were invited by Miss Wendy to attend the service she was presenting at her synagogue. This was really interesting, as there was quite a lot of interaction with the congregation (including a question-and-answer period at the end) and the text provided had the songs printed in Hebrew, English, and a transliteration of the Hebrew text; there were also annotations. Miss Wendy did a fabulous job and also contributed a very beautiful poem - I may actually start liking poetry...

Saturday night, we watched poetry in motion - we saw the Royale Brothers (yes, again, jZ) play at the Backstage Pass at Rosie's Cantina in Groton - it's a nice space, totally separated from the strip club portion of the building. There were a decent amount of people there and the bar had Laphroaig - so lovely on a chilly night. Even better, friends I hadn't seen in far too long were in attendance and we had time to catch up.

Eventually, the Royale Brothers hit the stage - two band members were dressed all in black, (perhaps in recognition of the passing of the Great American Hero, Evel Knievel), two in various shades of plaid. The addition of the fog machine & some fancy flashing lights ramped up the visuals, including much fancy footwork (a la James Brown) by Joey Royale, and the adrenaline-inducing sight of Sebastian Royale coming THIS CLOSE several times to nailing Joey in the head with his guitar (or perhaps just poking an eye out with a guitar string) and Joey coming THIS CLOSE to taking out some lights & electricals when he brandished his microphone stand in the air and howled. There's just something exhilarating about the combination of rock'n'roll, near electrocution and near ocular impalement...

As usual they did not disappoint - as Marko observed after they had finished, 'I pity the next band following THAT!' Indeed!

But the very best line of the evening was: "I've been making Feejee Mermaids...when I'm not working or making out with my girlfriend, I'm making these...things...!" Hmmm...I wonder how much it would cost the Aloha Alcohula* to obtain one for display? As for the person who uttered those fine words, please do yourself a favor and visit the NE Anomaly site!

As for All Things Tiki, there is rumored to be a tiki bar opening in Vernon very soon- of course, this will entail making an exploration into unknown territory. Hopefully the Sacred Text of The Bum will be utilized in its proper form.

And what about the Hula Dancer? Oh, that would be the tattoo that Nimble-Fingered Phil Royale sports on his forearm, merrily dancing away....


*the best tiki bar in Willimantic.

My Wonderful New Job

[How many times must I tell the same 5 people to shut the hell up in here?!?!]

Sample conversation between 2 guys (spoken loudly across 2 computer carrels):

• Do you eat at restaurants?
• Yeah
• What kind you like?
• Yeah
• Italian?
• Yeah
• Pizza?
• Yeah
• Fish?
• Nooooo...
• Wanna eat dinner with me sometime?
• Yeah
• Do you think (name of girl here) will eat dinner with me?
• ....yeah....
• Do you like Italian food?
• Yeah
• Hi, Steph! So, are there cameras even in the parking garage at the casino (11 millionth time he's asked me this...)
• Yes, they're everywhere- if you want to chitchat, you have to go downstairs.
• Ok! SORRY!
• Ssshh!
• Do you like Italian food?

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggghhhhhhhh!


(I had multigrain pancakes with cheese & scallions today. La Wombat seemed to think this was blog-worthy....)

Licking Stick

...that's the song that was echoing around my head this morning. Odd, because I saw two shows last night, not one of which had a single James Brown cover....

J10X, Lushy Luke & I went to see our friends Anne Castellano & Dorian James play at the Annex right in town- for once, didn't have to travel to hear good music! The Annex is a large brick-lined room above the art gallery of Main Street - and a convenient 45 second hike to the Main Street Pub. The sound is actually quite good there and we've seen bands ranging from acoustic solo performances, like Anne, to full-on noisy (the Chuck Hestons come to mind...)

Unfortunately we had to leave halfway through Dorian James' set in order to get Luke to New London for the Gamma Rays gig. The Rays recently acquired the fantastic Johnny Customs on bass, and that man can play! His presence has really charged up the rest of the band and they were fast & loose! Opening for the Gamma Rays was a duo from Maine called Meantone - they were loud, punkabilly & very rock'n'roll (a double bill of Meantone & The Royale Brothers in the future would be just divine). The singer/guitar player 'Meantone' was a fantastic player & during their set wore a gas mask with a mike inside. The drummer, Little Brett was terrific and part way through the set, Johnny Customs played with them for a few songs- too bad so many people missed such great shows last night - both places were pathetically short on audiences.

Levez-vous et dansez!

Who I'm Hatin' On: Bank of America- Incompetent Jerks or Evil Empire?

It's both! BoA is loaded with terrible, horrible attributes.

Sit 'round the fire, children, and let me tell you a story:

I was rewarded with a letter from BoA after paying off my unsecured cauldron loan that not only was the loan was paid in full, they were canceling a lien on my mortgage......?!!?!

Boys & girls...unsecured means I had the loan with no collateral and I had only held my castle's mortgage for two weeks at that point- pretty fast work on their part, considering they only have pig's feet with which to write!

So, I decided I would merely place a friendly call to the customer service village to find out what was going on. Two days and no less than FOURTEEN customer service trolls later, I still did not have an answer. Not surprising, as the completely unhelpful a**holes (a.k.a CUAs) spent a great deal of time transferring me around to the auto loan department, the 'we-only-take-applications-for mortgages-department', various flying monkey 'supervisors' (who were thinly disguised CUAs), the broken broom department, etc.

Now thoroughly irritated, as any Queen would be, I decide to send a message via magical email to BoA. Wow, if telephoning wasn't bad enough, the four CUAs I've contacted can only respond to my request for information via cut-an-paste scripts - the poor people working at BoA aren't even allowed to think for themselves! The final email I receive informs me I need to go to one of their branch offices in the deep, dark woods. As if I don't hate them enough already, I will have to get my slippers-of-silver-cloth dirty!

At this point, I have now reported them to the CT Banking Commission office. I want my grievance on record, recorded by our ogre-scribes.

So, I head to my local BoA branch, in the deep, dark woods. And you know what? It only took the very pleasant young fairy princess I spoke with for 5 whole minutes to inform me that it was all 'just a mistake'....

And if you're all very, very good, I will tell you the end of the story another day....

Authors Day!

A happy, inspiring Author's Day to my brilliant friends who write about everything from Tombstones to The Mangrove Legacy to Terry & the Pirates to Totoro Bento lunches to The Goth Scouts!