Saturday, August 30, 2008

Who I'm Hatin' On....A Nasty Rant

To no one's surprise, I'm sure: The Great Satan, aka Wal*Mart.

(Warning: this blog entry is profanity-laced & provides clear proof of some really horrific behavior on my part....)

I had a day off this week, so I decided to spend most of it running desperately-needed errands and returning things to various stores. We had purchased some sunscreen in June from The Great Satan (TGS) and I finally came to the grim conclusion I was going to have to go back & return it and once again realizing it is seriously not worth saving a few bucks to have to endure the North Windham TGS or any other for that matter.

So, I sauntered in, fresh from getting a sassy new haircut (which both my hairdresser & I agreed is 'fucking cute') and I'm in a fine mood, it's not packed in there and I head straight for the return counter in the front of the store. As I'm sauntering, I hear ''Lady! LADEE! LADee! LADY!" being shrieked and since everyone is looking at me, I turn around, stalking back to the thickly bespectacled hobbit 'greeter' who was 'greeting' me. I bent down, got in her face (as they say) and said 'Are you yelling at me? WHAT is your problem?!' She says something to me, which I could not understand as she obviously cannot speak English at all.

So, I get the impression that she wants to check my bag - I tell her I'm just returning stuff, so she takes my bag to check it (by now I'm seriously fucking furious), then decides to start chatting with a friend. Oh, I don't think so. I get right in there and say 'Hurry the fuck up- if you're going to waste my time, get a fucking move on!' So, she does whatever it was that needed to be done (scanning the stuff and giving me barcodes- WTF?) and I GRAB the bag from her and snarl 'I wouldn't be such a bitch if I wasn't fucking treated like a fucking criminal the second I walked through these doors!' So, thoroughly irate, I turn my wrath on the woman at the returns counter and asked what that was all about. She said 'we always do that', which is patently untrue as that has never happened to me before the last two times I ever returned anything. So much for consistency. Then when I ask her why this is done, she goes on, (completely freaked out at my hostility - yeah, I'm weird, don't like being treated like shit) about people who walk in and put stuff in bags to try to get money....then she stops. I say 'Oh so you just assume everyone is stealing? Don't you people even fucking know that unless you actually see something stolen it is slander to say someone is a thief? I'm surprised you haven't been sued yet!' Then she decides to tell me the items returned don't match the receipt - yeah RIGHT. She clearly does not get that I'm truly past the point where fucking with me might be a good idea. I fix her with THE STARE & quietly say 'Well why don't you get your manager over here so I can explain what fucking morons the cashiers are- either the moron at the register when I bought these items gave me the wrong receipt or the idiot in front of me can't do her job and read the receipt. So, what's it going to be?'

Yeah, I got my money. And the District Manager got an email. And the Better Business Bureau got a letter. TGS doesn't want to post its policies, then fuck 'em.

I kinda feel badly, but...they get what they deserve if they uphold these totally demeaning, accusatory practices. The people at BJs have endured my wrath for the same reasons as well.

So, Fuck the fuckity fucking fuckers at Wal*Mart!


8 comments:

K. A. Laity said...

Which is (just one of the many reasons) why I do not shop there. Ever.

K. A. Laity said...

Oh, but I forgot to say, this is why you are QUEEN OF EVERYTHING and mere mortals need to remember that! Good for you.

Cranky Yankee said...

I NEVER shop at walmart...
Why are you shopping there?

Wendy said...

Hey, sometimes we experience a moment of insanity and need to buy something quick. I avoid Walmart whenever I can, but sometimes in the middle of the night for those emergencies....Anyway, Queen, good for you! What you said needed to be said for every other person who just "sucked it up." So, I thank you for your sacrifice. As I said to you on the phone, (and you wanted me to quote here), Walmart -- "the haven of dignity" for all involved.

K. A. Laity said...

Well, that's what happens when you don't pay your workers a living wage, or give them health care, or a reason to care...

The Queen said...

Wow- I was considering pulling this post because I was kind of embarrassed that I wrote it....

Shopping at TGS is always on an emergency-based need ('Ack! My flight is 6 AM tomorrow, I forgot sunscreen!') - the one in N. Windham is so heinous that others seem like Harvey Nich's in comparison. My fave is going in the Old Saybrook TGS as all the Old Saybrookians are SO snotty- but still shopping in TGS! And they don't have 'greeters'....

I worked in a casino for 5 freakin' years, being totally verbally abused by patrons and it never once occurred to me to be shitty to the next person in line, so to speak.

I cannot believe people are willing to be treated so badly when they are the very reason these places exist. As for the people that work there, they don't HAVE to behave in that manner.

K. A. Laity said...

True enough -- we can always choose how we behave (and seldom remain conscious of that fact) but with those wages, you're hardly getting the pick of the litter, so to speak.

Women are so seldom allowed to express anger. Cheers to you for doing so, sweetie darling! Angry Women need to express that, not bury it inside so it comes out in oblique (and often self-destructive) ways.

macfixer said...

Wow, tell us how you *really* feel! Love it...